-Waffles aren't always a cure for panic attacks, but they can't hurt.-
There are a few reasons for this, the book tour being the first to come to mind because it involves me being social on a massive scale with people I generally don't know. This usually sets me off pretty well even though I hide it smashingly through sarcasm and witty repartee. Now most people would say I'm quite social and do very well in social events. Thing is that internally I'm screaming to just go home and hide. (I've learned to jam it down and cry when no one is around.) Even at my wedding I took 15 minutes to hide from everyone and catch my breath and that was from people I love. Plus, the tour involves event planning on a whopping scale. It's like juggling balls. Fifteen of them. And half of them are invisible. And one of the balls is a chainsaw.
Another source of stress is the whopping amount of vet bills for Eat Beast who, in the end and $1000 worth of tests later, apparently was just having a delayed reaction to Prozac. In addition to all this I have an unscrupulous ex I extricated myself nearly a decade ago. Suddenly, I being hounded by people wanting to serve him papers and threaten him on credit due. Naturally, none of the harrassers will listen to me when I tell them I don't know where he is and have zero contact with him because I assume they hear that record played more than a Katy Perry album regardless if it's the truth. (I haven't heard from him since maybe 2007, praise be to Jesus.) How they even have my number - or even more so, why - is beyond me.
Oh yes, and suddenly $3000 in house repairs are coming up. The joys of home ownership.
Suffice it to say, I haven't been cooking so much as rocking myself in a fetal position two or three times a day.
If I'm not out cold from Xanex then I'm so stressed out that I've become so gritty you could lay me flat and use me as a driveway. Still, I did find time to make sweet potato waffles. It's not really my recipe, I found one for pumpkin spice waffles at Two Peas & Their Pod and did a simple substitution of sweet potato for pumpkin. I won't post the recipe here because they deserve your traffic for this one and I need to get back under the covers and distract myself with Sex and the City repeats.
-And the brandy I hide under my pillow for emergencies.-
I'm sad to admit it, but a therapist doesn't sound so bad. Having grown up with one for a father I've adopted a more solve-your-own-problems kind of attitude, but it's been growing thought. Mainly, I just can't afford one so I've been talking to the corgi, but he's no good because during our last session he became occupied with eating a spider. So unprofessional.
So yes. Waffles. They are all kinds of amazing. Naturally sweet, plenty of spice, and I always add a bit more ginger than any recipe tells me to because I live on the edge like that. Admittedly, these and a cup of black tea hit with maple syrup and a shot of brandy are a fabulous way to reduce stress. I highly encourage it.
Also, lastly, the cookbook comes out next week. Holy crap. Three years of work and now it's seven days away. If you haven't pre-ordered a copy for yourself then I suggest you do to treat yourself. (The amazon page updated with all the lovely preview bits finally.) Give yourself the gift of cheese cookery.
XOXO
Garrett out.
Strongly recommend therapy for anxiety and other "issues". These waffles look great. Consider reading "Emotional Freedom" by Judith Orloff in the meantime. And maybe "Quiet" or "A Loner's Manifesto". Sounds to me like you are an introvert in denial! And I say this in a loving way, because someone said it to me when I needed it two years ago. Get out of bed. Do something nice, cook, walk the dog, walk yourself, and breathe. Meditate. Reframe. You wrote a BOOK! It got published!! You GOT the House!!! Now you have to figure out how to deal with the stress related to getting what you wanted and worked for!
ReplyDeleteTrue, thank you, darlin. =)
DeleteSometimes I just need to vent here in my little corner of the internet. I know I'm very lucky for all I have and for the support of people like you and my other readers. Thank you!
Since SATC was mentioned in the blogpost, your "You wrote a BOOK!"just reminded me of that book party episode; talk about flash backs!
DeleteI agree withh burnttoast completey. You wrote a book damn it AND it was published!!! That's more than I have accomplished in that arena. People coming to see you on your book tour WANT to see you. Now that doesn't mean they will all be people you want to be seen with it, but hey that is part of the package I guess.
ReplyDeleteAnd the rest - well life is a crap shoot. Crazy vet bills for pets I accept as part of the joy of being owned by a pet. Now home ownership that is another story. The house always has something that needs to be done even if you buy a brand new one. Not much you can do about it, you can't even ignore it - it will only be worse later.
Take a deep breath, go walk the dog so he will stop eating the spiders and get sick and need a visit to the vet. And get a gripe on the stress. It will do nasty things to you when you least expect it - trust me I know!
And this is all being said so you can remain sane and enjoy the release of your book. I can't wait until my copy is delivered.... since I am not in an area where you are touring.
Bobbi, where are you at? We'll be trying to get out more from the West Coast. =)
DeleteSouth Carolina at the NC/SC state line near Charlotte.
DeleteHey, sometimes things just get overwhelming, and it helps to talk to someone who can speak English back to you, is not a corgi. Especially not a corgi who is adding to said stress. Although. waffles and Sex & the City never hurt nobody, either... Good luck, man!
ReplyDeleteTo be clear the corgi is fine. Eat Beast the cat had a couple of tests due to bad reactions to meds. ;)
ReplyDeleteSpider eating, as well as wasp eating, mantis eating, etc. continues for the corgi and shows no sign of stopping.
DeleteCannot recommend therapy enough, if you can find a way to swing it. Are there any benefits available through your husband that could defray the cost?
ReplyDeleteWe had a similar issue with creditors who were seeking out the woman who previously had our land line number. Um, no, I don't know this person and I only got this phone and number for our security system. The calls came 6-7 times per day. I ended up telling family/friend to ONLY call my cell, and turned the ringer off on the land line, sending it straight to voice mail. I'd check the machine every few days just in case. It took a good year, but eventually the calls stopped.
Great article with excellent idea! I appreciate your post. Thanks so much and let keep on sharing your stuffs keep it up.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on the book launch & good luck on the tour. And I, too, have taken to making & eating assorted baked goods as therapy too.
ReplyDeleteOh gosh do I know how this feels. When I was at University, I would frequently hide in the bathroom from friends just to have a few minutes to compose myself. Sorry to hear I'm not the only one who does that!
ReplyDeleteI've moved recently too, which was more expensive than anticipated (isn't it always?) so empathy galore here. You're a fabulous writer, damn good cook and, from when I hear, a rather dandy person too :) So try to focus on the positive! (and never feel bad or sad about needing a little help. We all do from time to time :) )
The story I thought was way cool, and I am a waffle lover as well.
ReplyDeleteThank you for being transparent. I, too, struggle with anxiety. I know it isn't easy, but I pray you find peace. Cooking helps me too...and crying it out :) I'm excited to get "Melt" in the mail next week! EEK! Continue to push forward.
ReplyDeleteHugs!
Mirakol
You should also remember that sometimes having a panic attack is a perfectly normal reaction to a very stressful situation! As far as the book tour and having to face people socially goes, it's also normal that someone who enjoys writing might find actually talking to their audience a bit much. John Scalzi - who comes across as a pretty bouncy kind of person in his blog writing - says that he has to set aside time when he's at conventions so that he can hide in his room and be unsociable. Those around him understand this, and it's an accepted part of his schedule. I've got a terrible Internet connection so I can't find the blog post in which he talks about this, but he was very open about the fact that if he didn't do this bad things would ensue. Might be a tactic you could adopt!
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